The poet inside me wants to come out

By Ahmet Abdulaziz ….

If I claim to be a poet, most of those who know me, are perhaps going to believe it.  But they too believe only because they know that I am a crazy sort of person, who is fond of stepping into differing fields and adventures. Though most of them never read any of the songs I wrote, nor do I have any of these songs with me, to prove what I claim.

But I do know that I am a poet, who can start writing poems and songs anytime. Presently I find myself at the verge of starting to write songs. It is just a matter of time. Anytime it can happen. I wait for that moment.

I am one of those people who just burst onto something very odd and adventurous all of a sudden, without any reason whatsoever. I do that, and move ahead, without looking back. As so many friends have always emphasised, I could have done wonders had I decided to concentrate on something that I can do best.

If I look back, I can recall the occasions when I wrote songs. The first one that I can recall was written way back in the late 1960’s, when I was struggling to learn and play drums along with trying to form a musical group with friends. The only line of my first song that I can remember now is

George, John, Paul , Ringo
chase them where they go

After that I remember writing  a theme song for a society of youngsters. It was mid 1970s, and all of a sudden I had found myself among few young and old activists who were on the verge of forming a Society/Association of the youth.  I was invited to attend their first meeting where they were planning to organise an inaugural function to launch this society. The name of the society  (THE GALAXY OF YOUTH) was finalised in that particular meeting. As always I was sitting quiet as all were discussing various issues about launching the society. I came up with the idea that at the start of the function there must be a song sung on the stage  when the curtains goes up. The obvious question was what song? Everybody had looked towards me, and all of a sudden I said, I will write it. I did not have anything in my mind about this song, and I did not have any experience whatever. They all agreed and I was assigned the duty to write a song.

The time kept on passing and the date of the function was fast approaching, but I had not written anything. It was just a couple of days before the function date, when I forced myself to sit and write the song. Interestingly when I committed myself to write, it did not take more than 15 or 20 minutes to write a song, with which the society would be launched.

I do not remember the whole song now, but I can still remember the first two lines

“Today my heart is filled with joy

Here is Gee Ooo Yyy, GOY
The Galaxy of Youth “.

My friend Iftıkhar sang that song on stage as the curtain started rising up. He sang this while standing in the middle of the stage, with a huge GOY written on the wall behind him. I was among the audience, who welcomed the song with great applause. I remember applauding for myself, with others.

Then came another very long gap of time.

Twenty more years passed, when all of a sudden the poetry bug bit me, in 1995. Honestly it was not something of my own. I was motivated. A new accounts clerk in my department, where I worked, mentioned to  me that she was a poet. I asked her to show me what she had written. She showed me some poems that she had written and were also published. It was in Turkish.

Motivated by her, all of a sudden, in a matter of the next few days, I found myself writing songs in Turkish.  Of course that girl was more than eager to correct my Turkish. But I wrote a lot of songs. I wrote them just because I wanted to write them. I never kept them, because I am in the habit of not taking care of anything done, as I move on to something totally different.

During that period I wrote some songs in English too. I remember in those days I was bubbling with songs. Writing and just writing songs without looking back, and without caring about where they went.

I do remember a couple of lines from one of my songs (I am not very sure of the words in total, but I have tried to re-write the very idea of that song)

” they make it a fun when they sing a song
I listen to all till it comes to end

but then the scene changes nothing left for long
they take the guns and shoot till the end
I know them all they are the best in their job
they drink the blood and sing a lot
I love the music but don’t sing along”

Now the year is 2018. More than 23 years have passed since I wrote a song. But now all of a sudden something inside me is pushing me to start writing songs. I am not sure but next week you may read some of my new songs.