Whine, Whine, Whine!

We have received a humourous but thought-provoking article that we decided to share with our readers.

Compiled by the Old Groaner

This week OG Comments on a Whinge about Wine!

Dear OG. Why can’t I buy wine on Election Day?

Ten years we have lived in North Cyprus.  In that time we have paid to have our passports stamped with an extended Tourist Visa, paid all our taxes, ‘stopajes’ and charges, always had the car taxed, MoT’d and insured, supported local businesses and charities; and generally tried to be good citizens.  We have enquired about becoming citizens of the TRNC, but have been turned down.

This means we cannot vote in the General Election and therefore have no voice or representation in the TRNC.  Just like the early residents in the Colonies in the Americas we suffer from the tyranny of Taxation Without Representation – which we know prompted the Boston Tea Party (1773) and the American Revolutionary War of Independence.

Where is this leading to? I hear you say.

Well, we have had some family visiting us and wanted to throw a Goodbye Party last Sunday evening, so off I trolled to the local market to top up with some quaffing wine.  Had four litres of reasonably priced screw topped bottles in the basket with crisps and nuts as I headed for the check-out.  On arrival the young assistant promptly explained that I could buy the nibbles but not the wine.  Why?  “It’s Election Day and we can’t sell alcoholic drinks until the Polls are closed.”

This prompted a bit of a tantrum on my part, which unfortunately was aimed at the checkout girl and her hapless supervisor, for which I apologised, not their fault.  Later and on reflection I tried to come to terms with the Law that bans the sale of alcohol on Election Days in North Cyprus, even for non-voting residents.

1. Is this policy not a gross insult to the Citizens and Electors in the TRNC who apparently cannot be trusted to vote sensibly whilst ‘under the influence…’
2. Surely, during Ramadan, whilst fasting, locals are banned from drinking anything from dawn to dusk!
3. Do the lawmakers not understand that those who wish to have a tipple at home, can buy a bottle of RAKI on the Saturday, then get plastered on Sunday morning before going to vote?
4. Why should residents, who are not allowed to vote, be banned from buying some wine on Election Day?  The only effect this policy has is to stifle business for a day, or to perhaps make people wonder why they live in such a strangely run country.

Thankfully, we had enough stock of booze at home, so our party went ahead as planned, but I now know why I don’t usually drink Scotch with Beef Lasagne, doesn’t compare with a large glass of robust red wine!

Is there any chance that this new Government will repeal this and other senseless legislation that frustrates or insults people’s intelligence and brings some aspects of the Governance of the TRNC into question?

JAGL Kyrenia

OG:  No chance.  Logic or commonsense doesn’t seem to be in the mind of politicians here.  You’re right, there are similarities with King George 111 and the British Government whose pathetic action caused the Revolutionary War of Independence in the New World Colonies. 

Perhaps you could emulate those early settlers and have a Kyrenia RAKI Party; throw a few cases in to Kyrenia Harbour in protest at being taxed, having no representation at the seat of power and banned from buying booze on election day. 

You would certainly attract publicity, arrest and a stretch in the slammer.  Try getting a drink there, on any day of the year!